Suit Jackets

I have always enjoyed
wearing suit jackets…

because

something about
wearing a suit jacket
inspires a confidence
that is favorably reflected
in the eyes
of beautiful strangers

You see…

I’m looking for myself
in their smiles

when she turns away shyly
and brushes her hair
from her face
playfully careless

I am reminded
that I am God

and all that pride muffles
the high pitch ringing in my ears
left lingering
from an emotional hand-grenade
detonated two decades ago
that maimed my soul
but never quite managed
to take my life

You see
I’ve always enjoyed
wearing suit jackets

because

no one hits a child
in a suit jacket

no on starves a child
in a suit jacket

no one guilts a child
into believing
that his existence
is the only thing
binding souls
to a cruel world
filled with mouths of blood
and with necks
decorated in shades
of purple and blue

no one ignores
his silent screams

when he’s wearing a suit jacket…

so

I learned

to tuck my wounded heart
into breast pockets
and buy rounds for the bar

my smile dances
on puppet strings
as my dark stranger
tries so hard
to convince the world
that I am not broken

that I am worthy

such an empty feeling

yet each time still
I stitch my pride
into patchwork quilts
of all the reasons
you wouldn’t love me
anyway

if only you knew me
without my suit jacket

Published by John Onyx

A poet of the lost, the found, and the in-between. Iā€™m interested in collaborating with photographers, musicians, and videographers on larger projects. Feel free to email me at me@johnonyx.com if interested!

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